If you’ve watched The Traitors, you know it’s a masterclass in psychology. The format is simple but deeply human: a group of people must work together to win a shared prize, while some secretly work against the rest. The magic of the show lies not in the twists, but in the behaviour it reveals: how people build trust, manage perceptions, and navigate hidden agendas under pressure.
Ironically, these same dynamics play out every day in organisations and projects. In stakeholder engagement, whether we’re talking about community consultations, infrastructure planning, or major business change, we face similar challenges: building collaboration among people with different goals, limited information, and varying levels of trust.
The Traitors offers a surprisingly sharp mirror for how we might do that better.
Trust is earned, not announced. In The Traitors, players who loudly insist “You can trust me” are often the first to be doubted. Their words don’t carry weight, actions do. Trust builds through consistency, fairness, and openness, not declarations.
In stakeholder engagement, we fall into the same trap when we rely on slogans instead of sincerity. Saying “we’re listening” is easy; showing we’re listening is harder. Trust grows when stakeholders see tangible signs that their input influences decisions.
Lesson: Instead of managing messages, manage experiences. Transparency isn’t about sharing everything, it’s about ensuring what you do share is honest, timely, and relevant.
Suspicion thrives in silence. One of the most dramatic elements of The Traitors is the ‘murder’ each night, an act that creates chaos not because of what happens, but because of what isn’t explained. The vacuum of information is filled with fear, assumptions, and rumours.
Stakeholder relationships work the same way. When communication falters, people fill the gaps with their own stories, often negative ones. Uncertainty amplifies mistrust.
Lesson: Regular, proactive communication is a form of psychological safety. When people understand what’s happening, even if it’s bad news, they feel respected and grounded.
Allies are built on empathy, not alignment. In the show, alliances rarely last when they’re based solely on shared objectives. They endure when players genuinely understand and respect each other’s motivations. You don’t need to agree with someone to empathise with them.
Organisationally, we too often mistake agreement for alignment. Real stakeholder engagement isn’t about persuading everyone to your view; it’s about creating the conditions where differing views can coexist constructively.
Lesson: The best relationships are those where people feel heard, not herded. Empathy is the currency of enduring collaboration.
Transparency doesn’t mean weakness. Traitors often operate on secrecy, but the most effective players, Faithful’s or otherwise, are those who strategically share their intentions and reasoning. When people know why you make decisions, they’re more likely to trust how you make them.
In organisational life, leaders sometimes fear transparency will expose them to criticism. But withholding information rarely protects trust; it usually erodes it.
Lesson: Share the ‘why’ before the ‘what’. In engagement, context creates credibility.
Diversity of thinking strengthens the game. The most successful teams on The Traitors are those that bring together different personalities, planners, empathisers, sceptics, optimists. Homogeneous groups tend to miss blind spots and reinforce groupthink.
In stakeholder engagement, diversity is not a box-tick; it’s a strategic asset. The more perspectives you invite early on, the fewer surprises (and conflicts) you’ll face later.
Lesson: Inclusion isn’t just ethical, it’s intelligent. Varied voices build better outcomes.
The endgame is mutual benefit. The tragic twist of The Traitors comes when collaboration collapses at the final hurdle. Even those who worked together throughout the game can turn on each other when personal gain outweighs shared purpose.
Organisations often experience the same breakdown when projects reach delivery. Stakeholders disengage because they no longer see the shared benefit.
Lesson: Engagement isn’t a phase, it’s a relationship. The most successful projects keep stakeholders involved from design to delivery to legacy, so that the sense of shared purpose never fades.
The real takeaway
What The Traitors dramatises is what every leader, communicator, and stakeholder professional already knows deep down: people don’t just want to be told, they want to be trusted.
Stakeholder engagement, at its best, isn’t about strategy or spin. It’s about creating a culture of mutual curiosity, where people are invited to understand, challenge, and shape the journey together.
Just as in the castle, the game changes when we stop trying to outsmart each other and start trying to understand each other. That’s not betrayal, it’s leadership.
Rapport North 